Wednesday, May 20, 2015

A Grant Proposal

BREAKING NEWS! We have joined forces with the Eastern SeaBoard FiberglassVessel    Propulsion Committee. See the report here:
 
Grant Proposal:
The Ehlers 'Buffet' Hypothesis
with
Nuxoll Co-efficient

Comprehensive, real-time analysis seeking a direct correlation between morbid lethargy proportional to repetitive tasks and its resolution when treated with random, pleasure directed activities. A quantitative analysis of qualitative increase in subject's psychological disposition as affected by solar-heated atmospheric conditions combined with saline hydrotherapy will be measured using the following criteria:

Dietary restrictions including by not limited to crustacean consumption- Raw vs cooked.
Glucose variances in the form of distilled, oak-aged and cold processed liquids.
Semi-fowlers and full supine position as related to UV ray exposure.
Audio stimulation utilizing live vs prerecorded instrumentation of the 6-string and steel drum varieties as well as its subsequent kinetic musculo-skeletal reactions.

An increase in overall sparkling in subject's ocular region, as well as an increase in melanin resulting in unique skin patterns is expected after the conduction of the granular terrain between subject's meta-tarsals.

Travel will be provided by adjustable roofed automobile, manually propelled two-wheeled vehicles and floating wooden structure with large fabric attachments.

Pending approval, temporary research facilities will be as follows: 


Citations:  
Brent Burns and his story of my life: 

My friend and fellow land-locked beach bum, Angie
Jimmy Buffet
The Guy who parked a sailboat in my garage
Jimmy Cliff
The Maker of all crustaceans
Rum

4 comments:

  1. This sounds like a most interesting and informative analysis. Would you be interested in a comparative field study done in a more urban setting?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. East coast backers are always appreciated!!

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  2. Replies
    1. Your dedication to the cause is commendable Bonnie! Putting yourself at risk for SPF overexposure and Porcine Intoxication Coma??? Above and Beyond!! Sail On Sailor!!

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